On Friendships, Hot Weather & Bees
I arrived at Moody Bible Institute during the "spring"semester, in January of 2000, welcomed by 3-4 feet of snow on the ground. I had never been so far away from home, so miserably cold or so alone. I was the only new girl on my floor, accompanied by 3 new guys on my brother floor. At Moody, they have what they call brother/sister floors, so you automatically have a group of people you are "supposed" to get to know and that's just what most people do - hang out with their bro/sis. So, being on a floor with mostly upper classmen, and with every one else pretty much already in their little groups, by default I hung out with my 3 new bros. I never made a really good girl friend that semester, so I was anxiously awaiting the next year when we'd get a whole new group of girls. Hannah Jean Sandau, also known as Homeschool Hannah, Bean, Little "H" or really we had a whole list of names for her - came all the way from Opelousas, Louisiana. Little did I know what she'd be in my life then, and even now. We were not instant friends, and actually didn't really get to know one another until well into the semester. I couldn't even tell you how or when, but eventually I ended up in Sarah, Sucy and Hannah's room into the wee hours of the morning establishing some amazing friendships.
First impressions - Freshman. Chatty. Very happy - and by happy, I mean hyper and beyond excited to be there. Woah - curly hair! Homeschooled. Southerner. What did you say? I don't understand Cajun. SCC obsession. Music major. 3 girls in one room = Chaos! Girls, lights are supposed to be out by 11:00 p.m.!
What I think of when I think of Hannah: Late, late nights. Bean. "No dairy after 6:00 p.m." rule. Bucks, every night. Huckabee for Gubner. The Commons. Our summer trip to one another's homes. The photos we took to document said trip. Opelousas, another world. 5N without Hannah. Endless talks in the trash closet. Lucy. Every weekend at Scott and Joy's. What Not to Wear. Renting every movie that Homeschool Hannah had never seen. Hannah snapping her fingers to try and stay awake while watching said movies. The "Wall". The BMW with the heated seats. Can't Hurry Love. Kevin lip syncing Can't Hurry Love. Sweet Home Alabama - or rather, Alabamba. Our movie. Hannah meeting Dusty. Rummy. Calling Hannah from Thailand, telling her I was getting married. My Maid of Honor. Always there to listen. True and loyal friend. And now - way to far away!
Where am I going with all this? I have had many friends. Of course there's the bf's and bff's in elementary school - sometimes a new one every year, depending on who was in who's class. There's those throughout middle school and high school that I have a basic knowledge of what they're doing now. There's those from my discipleship group that will always remain close to my heart. There's so many from college that I had an absolute blast with and will have life long memories of. I think really close friends are few and far between. The thing about Hannah is no matter how much time passes, I can always be "me" with her. I can talk freely, knowing she will listen, being without judgment and offering me Godly advice. You know the times when you really just need someone to talk to, but not just anyone - someone you truly trust? The first person that always comes to my mind is Hannah. Whether it's e-mailing, texting, fb messaging or talking, I feel free to share my heart and be totally and completely me. And that's the beauty of real friendships. It's not your typical "how's the weather" kind of conversation, but rather, "what's in your heart"? Often, I grow tired of operating on the surface level. Not that I want every single person I run into to get into a deep, personal conversation - there's a time and place for everything. However, it's nice to feel like people care about what's going on with you. I'm not saying I'm great at that either - but have always believed that people need to be real with one another. I'll be honest and the first one to say that I have put up a lot of walls. I have truly sucked at being real with most of the people in my life the past few years. How can we operate as the body of Christ, when we feel as though we cannot really share what's going on inside of us and share when we're struggling? Aren't we supposed to be there to love and build one another up? And if we fear being "real" with the people in our lives, isn't there something wrong with that? I don't want to just function. I desire to thrive. And to do that, I think we all need real and honest relationships in our lives. We need real accountability, real support and real love. Proverbs 27:17 says, "You use steel to sharpen steel, and one friend sharpens another." Proverbs 17:17 says, "A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity."
This has been on my mind a lot lately. And maybe the best question I can ask is, what kind of friend am I being? If that's the kind of friendships I desire, then that's the kind of friend I have to be.
Anyway, that was on my heart so I thought I'd share a bit. Of course, I always have stories to tell. So, Silas is always asking me when he will be big like daddy. Today in the car he asked me, "Mommy, will you be sad when I am big?" I told him, "Silas, I will always love you but you don't need to grow up too fast. And yes, I'll probably be a little bit sad." He told me, "Oh momma, but I will take care of you when I am big. I will tell you 'it'll be okay'". He's always so thoughtful and sweet.
Today was HOT. Now, I know I grew up in Texas and I cannot complain about the heat in San Diego. The only difference is we aren't equipped for this kind of weather - our school does not have central air, but small window units that do not suffice in this type of weather. My office has no air. I knew it was going to be hot when it was 85 at 8:00 a.m. on my way to work. It's typically between 55 and 65 in the morning. When I checked weather.com around 10:00 a.m., it said 109. Keep in mind, this is in Chula Vista, which is always at least 10 degrees cooler than El Cajon, where we live. Dusty's car reached 113 today. So again, there's no comparing our weather to Texas, but there is a difference when it comes to air conditioning. Anyway, we did make it. I didn't melt. So, I guess I can't complain too much - but it was the hottest I can ever recall it being in Chula Vista. And, it's pretty ironic that my fellow Texans had a fall day today, while we enjoyed their intense heat. I guess we switched weather for the day.
Eli got stung by a bee. Or more accurately, he stepped on one. He was pretty upset, but also a trooper. Aunt Jen took extra special care of him, getting the stinger out and giving him benadryl. I really wouldn't have known what to do, so it worked out that we were at her house. I didn't know you weren't supposed to pull out the stinger with your finger, but use a credit card to swipe it off. Interesting.
So, to conclude - Thanks, Hanners for being such a great friend. Silas melts my heart every day with his sweet words. I hope tomorrow's cooler. I'm glad my precious Eli didn't swell up like a balloon. And thanks, Aunt Jen, for your help and for letting us use your nice, cold pool.
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